THE ABC'S OF KINK - GLOSSARY OF POPULAR AND UNUSUAL BDSM AND FETISH TERMS |
A - Abrasion To wear down the skin by using friction. Materials and toys such as sandpaper, steel wool, rough cloth, and bottlebrushes are often used. This increases sensitivity while giving both pleasure and pain. Acomoclitic Preference for hairless genitals. Acucullophilia Sexual attraction to men who are circumcised. Adult Babies & Diaper Fetish / Infantilism and Anaclitism Anaclitism is the act of achieving adult sexual arousal by activities or objects one was exposed to as an infant. These may include breast sucking, enemas, toilet training (urophilia and coprophilia), soiled clothing (mysophilia), bondage (womb confinement), spankings, humiliation, biting, nudity or exhibitionism, circumcision, submission, being bathed, nurtured, throwing temper tantrums, wearing infant apparel, having the penis slapped for masturbation, or playing with dolls. Algophilia Sexual arousal from experiencing pain. Allopellia Reaching orgasm from watching other people in sexual activities. Alligator Clamp A type of nipple clamp with tips that have teeth resembling an alligators mouth. Most clamps of this style come with removable rubber tips and have adjustment screws to limit how far they can close. Altocalciphilia High heel fetish. Amazon Fetish / Cratolagnia An extreme version of this is giantess fetish (macrogynophilia), in which men dream of being dominated by Statue of Liberty-size women. Why? For some men, perhaps it's reliving the feeling of being a small boy next to his towering mother. For others, it's about goddess worship and believing that women are superior. You have to admit that six-foot-tall women who weigh 300 pounds really are superior. You have to admit that because, if you don't, they'll kill you. Androphagia Fantasies of cooking and eating human males. Animal Training Training where the Dominant has his submissive play the part of an animal, such as horses and dogs. Armpit Fetish / Axillism Sex is the pits for axillists everywhere. Lots of women like to have their breasts used for sex. But only a precious, smelly few cater to the needs of people who are drawn to armpits that smell like France. No shower after a hearty workout? Beware of these telltale signs of pit perverts: strangers sniffing around your shoulders, audible sounds of excitement when you raise your arm to scratch your head, people you don't know humping your back when you're dangling off the ledge of a 50-story building. One repellent: stubble. Axillists prefer either waxing or leaving the underarm hair long, soft and uncut. So learn to braid! Because sex should be beautiful. Asphyxiaphilia See breath control. Autoclave Professional sterilization device for piercing equipment. Auto-Erotic Asphyxiation See breath control. Autogynephilia Sexual arousal from cross-dressing. B - Ball Gag A device with a rubber ball and straps, which secures the ball in the bottom's mouth to stifle screams. Ball Stretching The practice of stretching the scrotal sack so that it hangs lower using weights or other devices to pull on it above the testicles. As the sack is pulled, the testicles are squeezed leading to discomfort and sometime pain. Ball Torture Causing pain to the male testicles, also included in CBT or cock and ball torture. Ball Toys Toys used for playing with the scrotum - such as weights, straps, etc. Ball Weights Weights used to stretch the scrotum. See Ball Stretching Ballet Fetish / Nutcrackerphilia OK, there's the leotard, which at first glance could pass for nudity. Then there are the slippers and the stern pointe shoes, which have been adapted by fetish designers into towering stiletto-spiked ballet boots the footwear equivalent of a corset. The boots restrict movement to the mincing walk you'd crave if you were a male who enjoyed being in a tutu. Ballet Boots Extremely high heeled boots that require you to stand on the ends of your toes rather than the sole of your foot. Usually they have heels that are 8-9 inches and require considerable training and ability to walk in without assistance. Sometime also referred to as bondage boots. Balloon Fetish / Balloonism If a latex catsuit is sexy, why not a latex balloon? Too big a stretch? Some fetishmongers, actually wear pumped-up balloonwear, while others not only consummate their relationships with balloons and inflatable pool toys, but also dream of women's breasts inflating balloon-style. Others express their love of balloons in kinder, gentler ways by making balloon animals at street fairs. LOL! Barbell A straight piece of metal used in piercing, as opposed to a ring. Basoexia Sexual arousal from kissing Bastinado Foot torture involving the soles of the feet. Bdsm An acronym: including, but not limited to: bondage, discipline, domination, dominance, submission, subservience, sadism, masochism, sadomasochism. Beating General term for such BDSM activities such as flogging caning, spanking, strapping, etc. Belonephilia Sexual arousal from use of needles. Belt A leather strap used for striking the buttocks. Blend Modality Depilation (hair removal) using both electrolysis and thermolysis. Blindfold By blocking out sight - a common technique in SM scene - the bottom feels more vulnerable and increases the release of endorphins, thus contributing to the excitement in the scene. Blood Sports Fetish / Vampirism A group of techniques in which the submissive's skin is broken and blood is allowed to escape. Such as cutting, using needles, etc. See also "Edgeplay." Participants need a strong stomach and a high threshold for pain, But blood play is is beyond pain and pleasure. You can increase your chance of having a bloody good time with the proper hardware, such as disposable scalpels from veterinary suppliers (the beasts!) or needles from acupuncturists. Tastings are, of course, not a good idea unless you've been tested for diseases and you're monogamous, Or you're a real vampire, in which case, you're dead anyway, so drink and be merry. Body Art Artful body modification including: piercing, tattoos and brandings. Body Modification Making alterations to the appearance of the body. Includes, but is not limited to, tattoos, piercings, brandings, scarification. Body Shaving Removal of hair with a razor. Female and male submissives commonly shave their pubic hair clean. Bondage Making a submissive physically helpless and to a great extent immobilized. Techniques include rope ties, handcuffs, leather cuffs, stocks and mummification. Bootlicking Licking and cleaning of a Dominant's boots by a submissive is a common show of submission. Can also be a fetish. Bottom A submissive. Boy Term for male submissive. Boy Toy A male who is submissive to a dominant. Dominant can be either male or female. Branding Making a permanent or semi-permanent scar on the skin by burning it with a heated metal object. Usually used by a Master to "mark" his slave as his property. Brat Term for a sub who tries to get the attention of a Dom/me by "acting up." Breast Bondage Tying up the female breasts with rope. Breast Press A device that squeezes the breasts. Breath Control another type of "edgeplay" whereby the submissive's breath is stopped for a short period of time to increase pleasurable sensations. Also called asphyxiaphilia, autoerotic asphyxiation, breath games, breathplay and hypoxyphilia. Very Dangerous. Bukake Sexual scene where many men masturbate on and give a "semen bath" to a willing submissive Bullwhip A long, heavy leather whip usually longer than 4 feet. Butterfly Board A wood board where a male's scrotum can be nailed or pinned onto. Buttplug A "sextoy" shaped to fit into and stay inside the rectum. Buttplug Harness Usually a leather harness that prevents a buttplug from being removed either intentional or accidentally from the rectum. C - Cage A bondage practice, wherein the submissive is kept inside a cage. They can be so small as to restrict motion or large enough for two or more people. Candle A source of hot wax, which is dripped onto the bottom's body in BDSM play. Caning Using a rattan cane (although they are made of many other substances) on a Submissive. Usually more severe than a flogging. Cat O Nine Tails A whip that has exactly 9 strands. Some have a knot at the end for increased sensation or sting. Catheter Flexible tube used in medicine; in BDSM catheters designed for the bladder, often utilized in 'control' scenes. Cathterophilia Sexual arousal from inserting a catheters. CBT / Cock and Ball Torture Causing pain to the male genital area; usually in controlled, consensual BDSM scenes. Chastity Chastity In S&M circles, means banning or physically preventing someone from achieving orgasm or any form of genital stimulation in the long term, usually as a means of asserting domination. Also known as enforced chastity. Chastity Belts A device intended for this purpose is known as a chastity belt or a chastity device. Wearing such a device is a form of bondage. The device is used to keep the submissive chaste when the Dominant is away. Serious players can buckle in for weeks, but that's when hygiene becomes an issue. However, the better chastity belts, claim to have toilet-friendly features. Chezolagnia Masturbating while defecating. Circumcision The cutting away of some or the entire foreskin, in males. In the female, circumcision usually refers to the removal of the clitoral hood. Clamp Generic term for any BDSM toy that can clamp some body part of a submissive. Clingfilm Generic term for plastic wrap which is used in mummification scenes. Clip Generic term for any BDSM toy that can clip some body part of a submissive. Clitoridectomy Surgical removal of the clitoris. Clitorilingus Tonguing the clitoris. Also called "eating" which is easier to pronounce. Clothespins Wooden or plastic clothespins, typically used to produce pain sensation on the skin. Usually on nipples and genital areas. Clover Nipple Clamps Type of adjustable nipple clamps that tightens as it is pulled. Also known as Japanese Clover Nipple Clamps. Coca-Cola Submissive A submissive who only obeys the easy stuff or only when he/she feels like it. Cock Cage A CBT device that encase a penis shaft inside it. Can be either a solid or web design. Cock Cuff A chastity device that consists of a tube welded to a handcuff, usually both made of stainless stelel. The penis is slide into the tube and the handcuff closes behind the ball sack making removal all but impossible without unlocking the handcuff. A very effective chastity device. Cock Ring Rubber or metal ring that slips round base of cock and balls; supposed to increase duration of erection but also has D/s aspects to it. Cock Strap Leather or neoprene strap that wraps around the base of cock and balls to help improve erection. Cock Torture Cock and ball torture without the ball torture. Giving pain only to the penis shaft. Collar and Leash Worn by the bottom during this type of BDSM play. The Dominant holds the leash and the bottom must follow and obey. Consent To give approval. The BDSM code of "safe, sane and consensual" is the cornerstone of BDSM play. With consent being the most important. Contract A written agreement between D/s partners outlining the extent of their relationship. These contracts cannot be legally enforced, but they are often used to define the relationship. See also Slave Contracts. Control The Dominant should have control in one form or another over his submissive in any D/s relationship. Coprolagnia Sexual excitement derived from eating feces. Coprolalia Sexual excitement from dirty words. Coprophilia Gaining sexual pleasure from scat play. Corporal Punishment Retributive punishment using repetitive spankings and question and reply to change a bottom's behavior. Corset Very popular clothing item that cinches and narrows the waist and gives the female an "hourglass" figure. Crop A type of whip used in horseback riding, quite popular in BDSM scenes. It stings and can mark a butt severely, but is easy to master. Cross Dressing Dressing in clothing worn by the opposite sex. Does not indicate sexually preference in any way. Crucifixion BDSM play wherein a submissive is tied to a cross. Cuff A metal or leather bondage device that locks round a limb and can be used to immobilize the sub's limbs. Cunnilingus Licking and sucking the cunt. Cunt Torture Stimulation or pain inflicted on the female genitals. Cupping The placing of suction devices on the skin to increase blood flow. Typically these are used on the nipples and the genitalia. Increasing the blood flow increase sensation as well. Cutting Cutting the submissive's skin with a sterile knife. These can be either temporary or permanent. Made permanent by putting sterile foreign substances into them before they heal. Not for beginners. D - Doll Fetish / Pygmalionism A fancy term for sex with dolls. E - Electric Fetish / Electrophilia You know how you always get an extra charge out of sex by clamping your genitals to an electrode and turning up the voltage? Who would have known that was a fetish? It turns out that one of our safest and most versatile choices is the Violet wand, a 19th-century-style medical device that stimulates muscles with an electric current, but of course us freaks found an alternate use for it. Imagine what it feels like to have your lover lightly drag her fingertips over your skin, and then amplify that feeling by electrifying the touch, so that tiny static sparks erupt from her fingertips. You get the idea of its appeal. Just don't try it in the bathtub :) F - Fat Fetish / Morphophilia According to the National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance (NAAFA), 10 to 15 percent of Americans would prefer to have a plump sex partner. The morbidly obese have their own admirers now, quite sensibly called Fat Admirers. Feederism/ Feedees / Feeders Feederism is a fetish, centered on the practice of eating large amounts of food or being forced to consume large quanties of food for the sole purpose of altering one's body shape.. The feeder provides or force feeds the feedee with an abundant supply of food, either to encourage weight gain or simply for delight in the act of feeding. The feeder is typically more dominant, while the gainer is often more submissive, although this is not always the case. Fetish / Fetishism 1. A material object or a non-sexual part of the body that arouses sexual desire; and may be necessary for sexual gratification. 2. An object of unreasonably excessive attention or reverence. 3. An object that has magical or spiritual powers, especially such an object associated with shamanistic spiritual practices. 4. An unusual obsession with something. Fetishes are only limited by the human imagination. *Special Note* The meaning of the word fetish is dependent on whom you are asking to define the word. Outside of the dictionary, the popular definition of a fetish is anything that causes a strong sexual appeal, whether it be an object or an act, and is outside of normal sexually arousing things. Others might add that the fetish is necessary for sexual gratification to be accomplished. Fetish Act Refers to actions being done for the sake of exploration or development of a fetish. Objects are used in fetish acts. A person "has" a fetish, and "does" a fetish act, which makes such a person a fetishist. Fetishist One who possesses at least one fetish and engages in fetish acts. When the word is capitalized, it refers to someone who engages in power-exchanges involving fetish acts, as opposed to a fetishist who may engage in fetish acts without any other persons involved. Foot Fetish / Podophilia Foot fetish is a pronounced sexual interest in feet. It is the most common form of sexual fetish. However, a foot fetish can also be non-sexual. The term foot fetish is also often used to describe a variety of foot related fetishes, such as fetishes for various forms of footwear or various acts that can be done that involve the use of feet. Furry Fetish / Pseudozoophilia If your favorite porno is Return of the Jedi because of all the near-naked Ewoks, you may have what is known as a furry fetish and you're not alone. Furries have a sexual affinity for anthropomorphic animals from movies and comics. Furverts even get all dressed up in homemade animal costumes and have somewhere to go in various U.S. locations. The suits often feature easy-access flaps over those all-too-human privates. Sometimes it's so hard to be a human in love with a Beanie Baby :) G - Gynophagia A sexual fetish involving fantasies of the cooking and consumption of human females. The fantasy can be consensual, or be related and mixed with violence and rape fantasies. Often the fantasy involves the ritual beheading, to keep the head as-is, as a trophy and tribute, but the body is butchered and cooked for eating. For others the fantasy involves spit-roasting or general cooking of women, alive or dead, with or without their heads. H - Hair Fetish / Trichophilia While haircutting is like a striptease for some, it's rampant female body hair that excites many of these fetishists, including those attracted to hairy armpits and hairy pussies. I - J - K - L - M - Malicephilia The love of Mistress Malice. Mask Fetish / Transvestophilia Sex dolls are tawdry, but a real latex woman mask? That's another thing. Latex can be hot and sweaty, but usually you'll be too turned on while wearing it to notice. Mistress A woman who engages in entertainment with married men, or a woman having a sexual affair with a married man; or the "female head of a household" whether married to a "male/master of the household" or a single woman, same meaning. The term "Dominant Mistress" refers to a woman who exclusively plays the dominant role in a D/S relationship. In the pop-culture BDSM industry this term is synonymous with dominatrix. Mummification Fetish / Merinthophilia The ancient Egyptians waited till death to begin mummification, but modern bondage enthusiasts do it in the here and now with SaranWrap, pallet wrap or elastic veterinary wrap. Intense and not for amateurs or novices who can overlook small details. Like breathing holes. A simpler option is the VacBed, a perforated platform with a vacuum, which sucks thin latex sheets tightly over would-be mummies, creating a full-body condom for life-size pricks. N - Nailing BDSM play where the scrotum or breasts are nailed to a board. Naked Statue Fetish / Agalmatophilia The Romans worshiped the fertility god Priapus, represented as a statue with a perpetual boner. Women about to marry would offer up their virginity literally to the statue after priestesses prepared them with olive oil. Today, fetishlovers stick with the Greco-Roman theme but emphasize objectification fantasies or the idea of being on display. The idea of having a perpetual hard-on is why we leave our shirts untucked. Nasogastric tube Used in control scenes such as forced feeding. Nasolingus Sexual arousal from nose sucking. Necrochlesis Sex with a corpse. Necrophilia Sexual gratification from sex with the dead. Needle Play Another "edgeplay" where sterilized needles are inserted through the top layer of the skin (the epidermis). Most popularly it is done underneath and around the female nipple and the breast. Not for beginners. Negotiation discussing hard and soft limits and related items of BDSM taste before any play or relationship begins. It helps in defining Safe, Sane and Consensual between the dominant and submissive. Newbie Someone new to something such the BDSM play or lifestyle. Nipple Clamps Devices that clamp onto the nipples. Weights can be attached to stretch the nipples. Nipple Clamps often provide increased stimulation which can involve pain and pleasure. Nipple Rings Jewelry that looks like small hoop earrings that are inserted through pierced nipples. Another popular jewelry style for pierced nipples is the barbell. There also non-permanent nipple rings which stay attached by pinching the nipple. Nipple Torture To cause pain to the nipples. Typically by using nipple clamps, needles, mousetraps, pulling and twisting, etc. Nipple Shield Decorative nipple jewelry the encircles or even covers the nipple. Nipple Weights Usually weights suspended from either nipple clamps or from nipple piercings. Novice see Newbie. O - Oculolictus Eyeball-licking. Odaxelangnia Sexual arousal from biting Odontophilia A tooth fetish Ophidiophilia Sexual arousal from snakes Orogastric Tube A tube from mouth to stomach. Used in force feeding scenes. Not for beginners. Orthopedic Fetish / Fracturephilia A fetish that glorifies men and women gussied up in bandages, casts, and other such medical items used for the treatment of bone fractures. Who ever thought a car wreak could be this sexy? :) Osphresiolagnia Sexual arousal from foul smells OTK "Over the Knee" spanking were the subject is placed over the lap of the person administering the spanking. P - Paddle A flat instrument used for spanking purposes; usually made of wood or some other rigid material. Padlock Common type of lock used in BDSM play. Use to secure bondage restraints, securely fasten chain links together, as labia weights, etc. Pain Pain causes the release of endorphins that is thought causes the submissive to go into subspace. Pain Games BDSM play involving pain. Pain Slut Popular expression for a submissive who loves pain. Also a masochist Pain Threshold The point at which stimulation becomes pain. Pansexuality BDSM activities encompassing all sexualities, heterosexual, homosexual, trangender, etc. Parachute Ball Stretcher A toy resembling a parachute from which weights can be suspended in ball torture scenes. Phallophilia Fetish for large penises. Something most women have. Permanent Piercing Piercing the body in order to insert jewelry that is intended to be worn on at least a semi-permanent basis. Piss Play see Water Sports, Golden Showers. Play Piercing Piercing the body temporarily. All piercings are removed at the end of the session. Plushie Fetish / Plushophilia Plushes are stuffed animals, and plushophiles (or plushies) are those who stuff them in ways that God and children's toy companies never intended. Not all plushophiles screw their plushies. Many of them claim to relate to their toys on a spiritual level. Perhaps that means they only screw them on Sundays :) Ponyplay Fetish / Pseudozoophilia Role-play scene where the submissive takes on the role of a pony. Can be very elaborate. All little girls love to play with ponies. Just ask the ponyboys or ponygirls, for that matter who love to trot about in skimpy equestrian and bondage gear, wearing bridles and sporting bits in their mouths. They lead carts, are put on display, get groomed and sometimes even mate with their trainers, an obvious conflict of interest that undermines the credibility of the sport and one reason this will never be a demonstration event in the next Olympic games :) Power Exchange The dynamic whereby the Dominant is consensually given power over the submissive, whether for just the scene or for a relationship. Sometimes called Total Power Exchange or TPE. Pregnancy & Lactation Fetish / Cyesolagnia and Lactaphilia Got Milk? These fetishlovers find pregnant or lactating women desirable, and really enjoy not having to run out in the morning to get creme for their coffee. Why buy the milk if the cow is free? :) Press Style Nipple Clamps These are nipple clamps that press the nipple between two pieces of metal usually forced together by a thumb screw. The thumb screw allows them to be squeezed tight or jut enough to stay in place. Prince Albert Also known as a PA. A male piercing between the urethra and the underside of the penis. Pro-Domme Shortened version of professional dominatrix. Puppy Play Perhaps the most popular of animal roleplay and objectification. Here, the submissive actually mimics a puppy. Sometimes it can evolve into a lifestyle where the "puppy" even sleeps in a cage. Pushy Bottom Old school phrase for a very demanding bottom. Associated with Topping from the bottom. Pussy Torture The use of BDSM devices, such as clamps on the female gential area to produce pain. Pygmalianism Sex with statues or inanimate objects. Pygophilemania Sexual arousal from kissing butt cheeks. Q - Quirt A type of buggy whip used for whipping the submissive. Easier and safer to use than a bullwhip. R - Rack Bondage furniture patterned after the infamous torture device of the Inquisition. The bottom is put on it and "stretched" - but not in the extreme fatal way. Real Life or Real Time Means in person. As opposed to virtual or cyber life. Red Most common safe word meaning stop. Restraint Limiting the bottom's movement with the use of various bondage gear, equipment or devices. Restriction Limiting the bottom's behavior or physical movement. Riding Crop see Crop. Rimming Tongue contact with the rectum or asshole. Ring Gag A device that keeps the submissive's mouth wide open. Also called a piss gag. Role Play Games Taking fantasy roles in BDSM scenes. For example, nurse or doctor/patient, etc. Rope The most common of bondage equipment. Rubber After leather, the most popular fetish material. S - S.A.M Smart Assed Masochist. A pseudo submissive who attempts to control everything the dominant does. S&M Sadism and masochism. The sadist enjoys administering pain and the masochist enjoys receiving pain. Sadism Deriving Sexual gratification and enjoyment from the inflicting of physical or psychological pain on others. Sadist An individual who enjoys causing pain. The term dates back to the Marquis de Sade. Sadomasochism The perversion of taking pleasure, especially sexual gratification from simultaneous sadism and masochism. Safe, Sane, and Consensual A popular slogan in the BDSM world meaning that play should always be safe, with good judgment exercised. And, most importantly, it MUST be consensual. Safe Sex Using condoms and taking all necessary health precautions during sex. Safe Word A word or phrase a submissive can use to stop his or her scene. It is absolute. If a Dominant disregards a submissives safe word, that Dominant is considered "unsafe." The most common safe word is "RED!" Some also use a caution word such as Yellow to signify that the dominant is approaching a limit. A "safe gesture" is used if the submissive or bottom is gagged or otherwise incapable of speaking. Saint Andrew's Cross A popular piece of BDSM furniture where a submissive can be conveniently tied or cuffed to it and rendered immobile. It looks like a big cross! Saline Infusion A form of edge play in which saline, a sterile mixture of pure salt and water (not to be confused with contact lens saline), is injected into the labia, scrotum, or breasts. Swelling and increased sensation results. The saline is compatible with the body and is absorbed by the tissues after several hours or days. Saran Wrap Brand of cling film used in mummification scenes. Scat Fecal play. This may include but is not limited to enemas, brown showers, watching or being watched while expelling, being ordered to soil one's pants, or actually going as far as eating feces. The word scat is a slang abbreviation for scatological. Scatological Fetish / Coprophilia A fancy technical term for people who eat shit and unfortunately don't die :)~ Scene A BDSM session. Can be used to refers to "public scene" at a party where the participants let others watch or a private scenewhere just the dominant and submissive are present. Schoolgirl Role-play Popular RPG wherein the submissive is the "bad school girl" and the Dominant is the "teacher." Self-Bondage The practice of performing bondage on oneself by oneself. Shackle Metal or leather bondage restraint device consisting of round cuffs joined by a chain or bar. Shaving It is very common in BDSM for submissives to shave their pubic hair. Shoe Fetish / Retifism One who enjoys shoes. Popular fetish, even in the vanilla world. There are people out there who will worship, fondle, kiss, orally pleasure and have sex with shoes. They call it retifism. Women call it shopping :) Slapper Rigged paddle modified to make a loud sound. Slave A term used interchangeably with "submissive." Some consider a slave a more extreme version of a submissive. Slave Contract A signed consensual contract, wherein a submissive or slave cedes to the Dom or Master a specified set of powers over her for a set period of time. Although legally unenforceable, it is still a powerful document between dominant and slave Snake Fetish / Ophidiophilia The insertion of a snake into any body cavity is probably a better way to get salmonella poisoning than sexual gratification. Which is why you don't see much of it. Well, that and our laws protecting snakes. But the dream lives on in petting zoos near you :)~ Sound Medical device to be inserted into the urethra in medical play. Also called urethral sounds. Spanking To slap on the buttocks with the open hand, or a short flat object such as a paddle or a hairbrush. Used as both punishment and/or in role-play context in BDSM scenes. Spanking Bench BDSM furniture, a variation on the saw horse, onto which a submissive is attached (by cuffs, rope, etc.) for the Dominant to spank and play with. Speculum Medical device intended for opening and examining the rectum or vagina; used mostly in "doctor/medical scene" play. Spencer Paddle Type of wooden paddle with holes drilled though it. Spreader Bar A long metal rod that holds the submissive legs, thighs or even wrists wide apart. Stigmatophilia Sexual attraction to those with body modifications or tattoos. Stocks A piece of bondage furniture patterned after the Puritan model. The head and hands go through holes while the submissive is standing. Straitjacket, Straightjacket Confining device used mostly in psychiatric wards to restrain the insane. It is intended to prevent the movement of the arms and is usually impossible to remove without assistance. Strangling see Breath Control. Strapon A belt or harness that has a dildo attached. IT allows the wearer the ability to fuck another either in the vagina or anus. Strapping Another term for a *beating*. Submission The act of submitting to the will and desire of another, usually within negotiated limits. Submissive An individual who consents to give up power to a Dominant. This can be for any duration - for an hour or a lifetime. Subspace A state of mind and body - often like a trance - caused by endorphins emitted during a BDSM scene. Surface Burn A temporary brand, usually produced with copper wire heated less hot than steel used in making a permanent brand. Surface Piercing Temporary piercing through the skin's surface. Suspension Suspending a submissive with ropes, webbing or chain so that no part of the body touches the floor. Not recommended for beginners. Switch A person who can both Top and bottom depending on the situation and his partner. T - TENS Unit Acronym for Transcutaneous Electrical Neural Stimulation unit. Used for sexual stimulation is electrical play scenes. See also Violet Wand. TPE/ Total Power Exchange Term reserved for established 24/7 Master/slave relationships. TT Tit torture. Temporary Piercing Piercing the body temporarily. All piercings are removed at the end of the session. Same as play piercing. Thermolysis A form of electrical hair removal. Thong Whip A whip made of thing strands of either leather or rubber. When swing lightly it will not cause much pain, when swung hard it can cause considerable pain. Timophilia Sexual arousal from wealth, yet another thing most females have even if the wont admit to it. Top A Dominant, the person who is in charge or has control. Topping from the bottom This is where a submissive dictates the action in a scene, something that is highly frowned upon. Can also be used in real time context. When a submissive becomes too demanding. Torture Term meaning to cause pain. Toy Any piece of equipment used in a BDSM scene. Tragus Piercing through the ridge on the face side of the ear hole. Trampling & Crush Fetish / Macrophilia Some people like feet so much that they envy every doormat. So much so that they wish it were them. These fetishlovers loved to be walked on, crushed, trampled, and more by barefeet or a variety of fetish foot wear. Transgender Not quite male, not quite female. This is believed by many including Myself to be a form of birth defect in the essense that there are some of us who believe that much like being born with both genitalia that a person can be born the wrong sex and maintain a *Need* to be the opposite of the sex that they were biologically born. Some psychologists have even went as far as to coin it as a gender disorder. It is legally reconized as such and those who are truly transgender can find more help now then ever to live life as the gender they feel they were meant to be born. Some trangenders may or may not decide to actually have corrective surgery for this condition along with hormonal therapy and emotional support from a licensed Physician who specifically treats those with this form of gender crisis. Transgenderism Incorporating manners, behaviors, appearance, etc of the opposite sex while still maintaining some of the above of your biological sex. Tree Fetish / Dendrophilia Serious tree-huggers know what this is about. Sure, they call themselves Friends of the Earth, but I think they're a bit more than just friends. I think they're dendrophiles, people who have the compulsion to take a little wood of their own and use it to hump lumber. Some clinicians suggest that, though this is a very rare phenomenon, men who seek such phallic substitutes for sexual partners have latent homosexual leanings... and splinters :)~ Tweezer Nipple Clamps A style of nipple clamp that is like a pair of tweezers with a ring around the outside. As you push the ring toward the pincher ends, it causes the clamp to tighten or bite harder. U - Urethral Play Play involving the urethra, the tube that runs between the bladder and the outside of the body. Not for beginners. Urethral Sound Medical device to be inserted into the urethra in medical play. Urolagnia Sexual excitement from urine or the act of urination. V - Vacuum Pumping Using the suction of a vacuum to increase the size of body parts. Vampirism Sexual arousal caused by drinking blood. Vanilla People not in the BDSM or Fetish lifestyle. Most people, whether admitted or not have some sort of fetish. It can apply to any heterosexual or homosexual who does not care for kinky sex. There are differing roots for this term. Some claim it refers to the plainness of *vanilla ice cream* as opposed to those who like more adventurous flavors. Violet Wand An electric device usually in form of a glass cylinder, which uses the effect of high frequency electric charges to apply intense stimulation. Voreaphillia Love of being eaten alive. A fetish in which a person is stimulated by fantasies of being devoured (usually swallowed) alive by another creature, human or otherwise. W - Water Sports The sexual enjoyment of urine play. Also called Golden Showers (or GS). Wattenburg Wheel A medical pinwheel that is commonly used in BDSM play to stimulate or cause a feeling sensation. Wax Play Play in which the Dominant brings hot wax on the submissive's skin. Web A bondage device, popular in many dungeons, created with ropes that are spun like a spider's web. Wet & Messy Fetish / Automysophilia Maybe, as a hormonally imbalanced youth, you experienced strange private feelings every time Lucille Ball got doused with cake batter or chocolate syrup. Welcome to the world of WAM, wet and messy fun. A form of play that utilizes any wet or messy substance, such as whipped cream, chocolate sauce, milk, or water. If you're lactose intolerant, you're not out of luck mudlarking involves rolling around in wet clay or mud, while wetlook deals with wet, elegant clothes, and gunge covers you in food and pretty much anything... even bodily excretions. Weights Used to stretch body parts such as nipples and labia; usually attached to clamps or piercings. Whip Usually made of leather with a medium size handle and long braided leather strings. Whipping Post In olden times, a post to which offenders were fastened for whippings. Reproductions are sometimes used in BDSM dungeons. X - Y - Z - Zelophilia Sexual arousal from jealousy. Zoophilia Defined as an affinity or sexual attraction by a human to animals. Such individuals are called zoophiles. Personally I think of this as an attraction usually formed by people who are too ugly to attract those of the human species, but hey those are just My own thoughts. I am sure that Micheal Jackson and his lovely chimpanzee fiance would disagree! |
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